I'm American, but the post sounds just like it reads. I find it best to read it with an irish acsent, but you can read in a retarded acsent if you like, doubt it'd read the same though.
Btw.. Cake Fairy.... is that a self proclaimed title or an occupation. Not really sure what good go'n round wand'n cakes would do, can't see how it'd pay well.
P.S. I'd read that in an Irish acsent too, that way your head wont get mixed up again.