Funnies from the hunter forums

[SilverTalon]

For those who don't go there often, I found this gem yesterday:

Top five things Hunters say to their pets

Some of the highlights (for those too lazy to click):

5. WTF I just fed you!
4. Unhappy? SO AM I. GET YOUR OWN FOOD FOR A CHANGE.
3. STOP RUNNING! Scaredy cat! well...ok wolf...but do you think it's YOU those warlocks/priests are after?
2. NOT AGAIN! Fine, next time I'll just tame a sheep!
1. SILLY ME! I thought nothing would make us wipe, then I remembered we have YOU!

5. SAVE ME.
4. Duel's been over for 3 minutes why are you still a sheep!
3. Have a quail. Have another quail.
2. Eat the noobie! Mwahahahahaha!
1. Go pull, I'll raise you in a minute

5. I hate you
4. I hate you
3. I hate you
2. I hate you
1. No wait, I love you

3. Im missing half my dps... oh there he is. <---ESTARA!!!

5. Yes I want you to pee those Shaman buff developer notes. Good fluffy!
4. When the hell did you decide you didn't want to bond as deeply and soulfully. Greedy bastard heal me and only me!
3. Holy Crap, you're hungry again? I could tame Ricki Lake and she'd have eatten less.
2. I know you've never caused a wipe, everyone still hates you.
1. Yes everyone disregards you in pvp, unless they want to cost me money. Isn't this a good thing? A place you finally die less then me.

5.) What do you mean you're upset? Blizzard said there'd be no happiness penalty for dying in Alterac Valley. They never lie, so you're obviously faking.
4.) No, I mean it. No quail. Stop griping and go kill a gnome.
3.) Listen, I've died 50 times in past half hour too, you don't see me complaining! Shut up about the quail!
2.) For the last time, I am not stopping to fish. Will you quit with this red face pouty wouty BS and go shred some priests already?
1.) MISSING: Level 60 Cat. Whitish, with stripes and glowing eyes. Last seen: Alterac Valley.

5. The nice mage made it for you, and you're going to eat it.
4. That was one heck of a diet you went through just before I tamed you.
3. I know, we wouldnt have wiped had the healer given you any attention.
2. Nice job subbing for the warrior.
1. Sorry Conjured, take one for the team. (FD)

5. Funny, You were faster as my enemy than you are as my best friend.
4. ok... that's it... when they make alchemists a "happy pill" forumla, we're investing.
3. I know, I know... I too would think the priest would pay more attention to you after saving them a dozen times.
2. nononono... passive passive!... DANGIT! That's it, your goin off dash.
1. lvl 58 and only 100 spirit.... your pathetic, you know that, right?

There's plenty of other ones...but I really laughed at those. Don't know if the non-hunters will get some of them...but I think so.

[destinysend]

funny stuff..
couple i liked
5. Your a cat? what do you mean you cant jump
4. Growl faster! OMG resist? Your a damn wolf!
1. That'll do, pig.
3. Here I thought you were a blood sucking beast...only I could befriend an apple eating Bat.
2. What kind of Raptor can't dash? Lazy bastard.
1. Why is it everytime I jump down 3 feet, you have to run a quarter mile around, aggroing 38 mobs and getting the entire raid killed?
1. What do you mean you need Tums??? I Told you Gnomes make you sick.
3. I don't know who sucks more, you or me
5. I don't know man, that quail has been there a while.
4. See i told you it was there a while.
3. Maybe thats why you are always hungry.
4) Since when could birds fly underwater?
5) ok so you can't jump your always hungry, you can't keep the mob off me or the priest, you always die to fast... and your dps sucks.... tell me again why i have you?......
1) ya know... why are you so hungry when you are biteing everything.... why not swallow for once...
If my pet was actually able to follow me around when mounted, like it was supposed to be few patches ago, i might then be able to tell him 5 things.