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Old 11-28-2007, 08:26 AM   #1
Stoke
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Pitiful

CHARLOTTE, NC (AP) - A seven-year-old Charlotte, NC boy was at the center of a courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible.


The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custo dy of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Carolina Panthers, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

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With the recent erosion of quality parking near the stadium due to massive development of new construction projects, Bank of America Stadium is proposing to convert some previous private space on its property into premium parking for gameday.

The spaces will go for $50 each and are located in the endzones of the playing field. Due to expected frequent activity from the visitor teams in their endzone, cars occupying the visitor team endzone will need to be moved to the home team endzone each quarter the teams exchange sides.

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Old 11-30-2007, 01:43 PM   #2
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Re: Pitiful

I don't have these problems with my beloved Patriots...

Or Celtics.

Or PC Friars.

Or Red Sox.

hmm.. seems like winning has become infectious around New England. :-)
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Old 11-30-2007, 04:18 PM   #3
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Re: Pitiful

Wow. That article was funny and sad all at the same time.
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Old 12-02-2007, 08:12 PM   #4
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Re: Pitiful

We have one of those too:

CHICAGO POLICE REPORT:

Lovie Smith's House was egged.
Chicago police reported that some individual attempted to "egg" Lovie Smith's house last night.

The report stated; An empty egg carton was recovered at the scene. Two eggs hit Mr. Smith's house, 3 eggs went over his house and hit his neighbor's back door, 2 eggs hit the houses of each of his next-door neighbors, and the remaining 3 eggs were found broken on the ground near the carton from where the individual threw them.

Looking at what was hit; police officials say they are considering Rex Grossman as the primary suspect.
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Old 12-03-2007, 04:59 AM   #5
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Re: Pitiful

Rex Grossman. lol.
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Old 12-03-2007, 06:17 AM   #6
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Re: Pitiful

I'll chip in! I made this one myself so it's probably not very good...

PHILADELPHIA, PA - Lofa Tatupu sustained a head injury today while leaving Lincoln Financial Field after their 28-24 victory over the Philadelphia Eagles. One witness described the incident with Tatupu walking off the field into the tunnel when a football "whizzed through the air like a bullet" and collided directly with the back of the linebacker's head, leaving him lightly concussed. A.J. Feely was identified as the thrower and detained by police, pending assault charges. Feely swore that he was simply trying to get a quick after-game practice with some of the Eagles wide receivers and that his throw which went directly to Tatupu in the tunnel was intended to go to one of them.

After reviewing game film, Feely was released without charges.
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